Having fought as hard as he could, Didsbury Son finally gave up and went to sleep on the night before school started. He is actually looking forward to returning. That took me back to my school days. Anyone over the age of 20 who tells you they enjoyed school is lying. My greatest joy was a note getting me off games on a Wednesday. My greatest achievement was learning how to do my make-up in the girls’ toilet. The 80s, we backcombed our way through that recession.
My inbox, all magazines and conversations are full of good intentions; positive thinking, and adjectives. Every guide, guru and geek has a plan for success now it’s the New Year. On January 1st I felt inspired, 2nd it was mildly irritating and exhortation on the 3rd to “grasp the sweet nettle of challenge and climb the mountain of productivity” has me reaching for the carbs, and negativity that I had resolved to give up.
So here are my top tips for a fulfilled 2012 topped up with health, wealth and happiness.
1. Save the Sausage Sandwich for the weekend. There is a Polish saying “the sausage is not for the dog” or for Monday –Friday. Whether it’s a Didsbury Village Farm shop barm or a Herb and Brie Art of Tea breakfast – don’t sneak one in on a school day.
2. Delegate – If Didsbury Son craves adult style independence then he should be granted that wish. School uniform preparation, bag packing and washing up can all be delegated easily with straight face as requested.
3. Live with An Attitude of Gratitude: as the rain lashes the street and you are out before the sun has risen. As the pinhead on minimum age makes you seethe; as Didsbury Son comes back from a friend’s house with specific anatomical questions just smile and thank the universe for the joy of dilemma.
4. Remember Rupert: His minions hacked the phones, his wife stopped him taking a custard pie in the face but thanks to him you are never more than 36 hours from a live football game in January.
5. Look to the future. This time next year I can get on a metro less than 2 minutes from home and be at the airport to pretend to fly somewhere warm.
6. Beware Get Rich Quick: Playing the lottery does not give you an investment portfolio.
7. Count your blessings. If you can get to three then take break, have a brew and relax. You have had a productive day.
8. If you break your resolutions then there is always next year.
9. If you run out ideas, be good to yourself and stop.