Didsbury Dad’s Milestones not Millstones
It’s a New Year and with intentions, aspirations and freshness come a range of stepping stones to measure your annus hopefulus.
With New Babies it is all about milestones. To begin with it’s first feed, change, bath and first family member to turn up uninvited and mention something insensitive / inappropriate / uncharitable (delete as appropriate). This golden period in the hospital is followed the scary “at home” firsts.
The first time you forget they can roll off the bed if you don’t wedge them in properly. The first time you get your baby sorted, relax – then remember there are two of them. The first guests who, having sat doing nothing whilst you ran around them for an eternity spend two joyful hours reminding you how awful it is when people outstay their welcome. There are also the old friends with whom sharing your happiness means more than you had ever thought it would. There are the touching and the funny rite of passage milestones. The first projectile vomit and wee to land on your head, in your mouth or on a pristine work outfit, The curl only a newborn can achieve when they feel as though they have folded into you and for me… the first donning of the football romper suit brought for me by Didsbury Wife when they first appeared on a scan. I put them on the twins and caused Didsbury Son to sag as I blubbed almost as much as at birth, fantastic.
Every day seems to bring a new milestone and at three months there is teething and weaning on the horizon. We already have a stack of memories as bright as a Bermuda sunrise to us and as dull as a foggy Grimsby morning to anyone else.
There has been the first smile, twice. Didsbury Son Junior took longer to come around to a smile that wasn’t pre-Expelair but his beam from a cot at 6am melts the previous 8 hours away in the most perfect manner. His cheeky little sister is already on the way to learning that a flirty well-timed grin can get her around her Didsbury Dad and Didsbury Son. We have enjoyed their first grip, their first kick and their first swim and this week we reached a poignant, and very 21st Century milestone.
This week the newborn clothes have been moved out of the nursery and onto eBay. The filtering that splits between keeps, family, friends, charity and sell is a new and necessary phenomenon. My income now splits equally between Boots, Mamas & Papas and Boots. Terry nappies are great and in the most Didsbury way we try, but there are still only 24 Hours a day and Huggies have this nailed.
New fathers have to learn many new skills. These include singing the clean versions of songs, physical multi-tasking, not moaning about pain, patience and most importantly – when and how to bid up in a VGC Rainforest Jumparoo available in Wigan. We must learn the value, the real value of a Hardly Worn Baby Gap Bundle from a pet and smoke free home. A new dad must now be at one with the language of BNWOT and why positive feedback’s omnipotence means lip-biting about people with whom a good virtual row would usually brighten a slow afternoon.
There will be many more milestones. I look forward to the day when Didsbury Son and I stride onto School Lane, a toddler in each hand for their first haircut. At the current exponential rate of growth there will be 35 barbers on School Lane, each with its own bakery and twinned Charity Shop. Then we will skip to Gourmet Burger King to enjoy the space and light an empty restaurant can create , stopping only to read Didsbury Magazine to find out what’s on 7 miles away in Hale and Altrincham.
So many milestones to look forward to as these two little treasures grow and expand. It’s only been 12 weeks but already my littlest Didsbury Son has ceased resembling Winston Churchill and Didsbury Daughter almost has hair. 2013 is shaping up nicely.
A baby with the first signs of hair. Chair has one careful lady driver and comes from a house with a big fat cat and a small one whose a bit sneaky