Didsburydad's Blog

From the not so mean streets of M20, blog about being a dad, Didsbury and dealing with parental confusion

Archive for the tag “Celebrity Big Brother”

Iggle Piggle v Homeland and Utopia

This much I know. In The Night Garden is possibly the finest television I have seen this year; edging out Homeland’s multi-story pile up and the beautiful crafting and colouring of Utopia by a short Nonk.
Derek Jacobi’s VoiceOver is worthy of forgiveness for that thing he shares with Gandalf on ITV, where Frances de la Tour plays a female, middle-class Keith Lemon.
ITNG, a flagship show on the mighty CBeebies could go prime time. If the unfathomable Deal or No Deal ( the whole open a box is Key Stage 1 motor control) is an 8pm show then why not “At Home with the Pontypines”. 8 kids, living next door to their twins who also have 8 kids – more enticing than Celebrity Big Brother and genuinely mind-bending.
How about a Top Gear Special on Ninky Nonk v Pinky Ponk? We are a Ninky family but there is something about the Pinky Ponk’s wheezing beauty that draws you in. I was granted access to the cast to find out their take on being part of this QI for the pre-lingual.

Part. 1:
Iggle Piggle in his own words. Iggle rarely gives interviews and is known offscreen for his thoughtful poetry and landscape watercolours.

“Once the blankey comes down, the light goes on and the music starts you have a lot of time on your own to think. It’s just you and a rolling sea. There’s no one running circles around my palms and until I get through the hedge it’s a lonely journey. The guys are great and I think I could sail there in my sleep, but… Sometimes not even a smile and a kiss from Upsy Daisy can make up for that commute. Me? I know one day it will end. Only Postman Pat and Bob the Builder seem to go on forever and they have a trade. Glee are interested in a spin-off of the Blankey dance but they think Sky Blue’s a weak colour so we are in discussion. I’m not bleaching for anyone.

The best thing? Good question. I don’t think you ever get over being a role model for the Holophrastic Babblers. It’s a gift.

Babies, Dogs and an endless cycle

Money finds money, fame follows fame and like finds like in so many ways.
I mused on these thoughts as I pushed the Mighty-Headed one and his cheeky-pearl top sister around The Park.

It seemed apt. By 8am this morning I had changed four nappies, each fruitier than the last and demanding a swift handed dexterity that would have satisfied Andy Murray and Paul Newman.

It seemed that every dog on its morning run found a spot directly in my eyeline to crouch and unload. After three circuits I could describe the angle of backleg bend on everything from a giant poodle to a French bulldog.

There are times when, nappy sack opened and wipes at the ready that it is just the wonderful world of pooh without the Winnie.

I can de-nappy, wipe and change with both hands, on any surface with enough space to park a baby’s bottom. I have seen the Y in De-Mystification and worn presents from each orifice from each baby.

There is something therapeutic about a nappy change. It combines trust, grooming and that thought somewhere in your mind that in a few decades you might need the care repaying so you do your best.

So as I dodged a desperate Daschund near the park entrance I did count my blessings, safe in the knowledge that one day they will be toilet trained and I will have breakfast without the smell of baby wipes. But by then they will probably want a dog.

A Sheepdog this morning looking for somewhere quiet to read the paper

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